Day 30

Frank Herbert said you can move a planet with a big enough lever. OK, so what about prising two kids off the couch when enjoying summer holidays playing Wii in air conditioned comfort? The alternative being 30 humid degrees, whilst clearing a season's worth of crusty hay and cow dung out of the barn. Well it wasn't as hard as one might think. Whilst their parents were out, Tyler and Hayley were our hosts and as their guests, I asked to be taken to the barn to clean it out. So as to be accommodating hosts, they indulged our strange request somewhat to the surprise of Kelly, their dad, when he returned.

Tyler (our host for the morning), Jake (the Golden Retriever), me and Kelly, Tyler's dad, the owner of the farm and a family friend.

Nancy, Hayley (junior host one), Shaun and Tyler (junior host two) amongst the canola of their dad's farm just north of Regina in Saskatchewan.

Naturally Jaffa made short work of recruiting two more future Mini owners.

"Life's a journey, not a destination." 

It was with that in mind that God made the prairies. If you get bored crossing them it's because you're focused on the destination and not the journey.

We stopped to play "hide and seek" . . . . .

. . . . . . but with Jaffa it should really be "where's Wally."

. . . . . of course hiding Jaffa isn't anywhere near as hard as hiding this behemoth, even if he is green!

They say Alberta's so flat if your dog runs away, you can see him running for four days. But not the Badlands near Drumheller. One minute you're driving through a sea of wheat and canola the next you drop down into a valley straight from the Jurrasic period.

Day 27

Departing Niagara, we were en route primarily to visit some friends just outside of Regina in the middle of Saskatchewan. This would have been over 2500km's even if we'd gone the short way via Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota and North Dakota. But this is a trip across Canada, not the USA, so we went the long way via Sudbury, Thunder Bay and Winnipeg.

And not satisfied with that, we inadvertently got off highway 17 adding a further 350km's to our course, ending up in Timmins - home town of Shania Twain although she wasn't there when we called by. Ironically she has a property in my country, so perhaps she's in Wanaka enjoying a southern hemisphere winter. However everything happens for a reason, thus the detour proved fortuitous because to get back on course to Thunder Bay we took highway 11 and had a most bizarre day of encounters with big things.

After the big detour in the big province of Ontario in the big country of Canada we found:

- the big flying saucer at Moonbeam

- the big moose at Hearst along with a massive Irish Wolfhound who stopped to play

- the huge wood pile in a place we can't recall

- the big Longlac (Long Lake)
- then there was the big snowman in Beardmore

- the big stop sign in Thunder Bay
- another big dog in Thunder Bay
- and finally the big bright full moon that night

In Thunder Bay we met yet another young Mini fan. Funnily Blair hailed from Yellowknife and was heading to Halifax with his family, the converse of our plans.

We were warned that the prairies were long, flat and boring. Well as a piece of advice, two out of three isn't bad I suppose. The prairies are long and they are flat but they're far from boring. But I guess that depends upon your approach. It's a bit like the old saying "Some people walk in the rain and some people just get wet." Admittedly we strayed off the beaten track a bit every now and again, but some of the scenery is just outstanding. The colours of summer and the way clouds cast certain areas into shade makes for constant variation - that's assuming you're prepared to look and occasionally stop and smell the roses.

All cars have a personality if you give them one and Jaffa's no different. Here she makes like a lioness stalking prey in the on the African Savanna. In reality we're just some lost tourists crossing the Canada prairies on another long lonely highway - and what great fun it is.

I should take this opportunity to say that I've lost count of how many Canadians have said they've never seen their own country. Please, to all Canadians, you have a fantastic and beautiful country, get out and see it. It's never too late and nothing's impossible.

Day 23

Our next stop was Ottawa, the nation's capital. And a very nice place it was too, once we got out of Jaffa and could walk around the parks, canals and buildings. I mention my preference for walking in Ottawa because all the one way streets, no left turns and no right turns make you wonder if they didn't let Mr McGoo and Wily Coyote loose one weekend to do their road marking. Wily Coyote was a big fan of straight line speed, this explains all the no turn signs, Mr McGoo was blind, which explains their randomly erratic placement. All that aside, the area around the parliament buildings and canal is very pretty and a nice place to explore on foot.

Tall buildings are generally a fascination to most people, so a stop to see the CN Tower in Toronto was inevitable. Here Nancy and I were partaking in a morning cup of Joe courtesy of our favourite Café in Montréal, Café Olympico. (No there's no satellite Oylmpico in Toronto, we made our own.)

Travelling on the Toronto city highway network is an illuminating experience, although perhaps not for the faint hearted. Try it around peak hour (apparently 0000hrs to 2359hrs), find a 2+ pax only lane, get in it and hold on because in a convertible Mini with the roof down you're like a coin being sucked up in a vacuum cleaner. Once you're in and can't get out, whatever speed the traffic does at the time is what you're vehemently obliged to do. For us this was well, well, well above what the road was signed for. What makes it even more exciting than the cyclonic jetstream of air being sythed over the windscreen and about the roofless cabin is that on one side you have a stationary concrete lane barrier and on the other side you have three, four, five or even six lanes of traffic going over 100km/hr slower than you.

If you're going to see tourist attractions in Toronto, you may as well make the effort to go the extra few hours south to the US border for Niagara Falls. All I'd ever heard about Niagara is that the falls are impressive and the township is cheesy - I wasn't wrong or dissappointed on either count. The falls are awe inspiring and the town is glitz, noise and colourfully cheesy. We had a great night, drinking, people watching, dining (cheese pizza) and just enjoying the carnival atmosphere of the place.

The other night in Quebec the Black Eyed Peas asked "where is the love" and I mentioned I'd keep an eye out for it. Wonderfully, it's actualy all around if you take the time to look. But so as not to risk appearing intrusive or crass like the paparazzi, I'll write about such occurrences when I can but not photograph them necessarily.

Whilst I was seated at a bar overlooking Clifton Hill in Niagara, a young mother sat in a wheelchair - for what reason I'll never know. On her lap sat her young daughter and behind them both was dad, pushing them up the hill, all were discussing where to go next and what to do. It was, from all outward appearances, a young family beset with a challenge most others will never face, but they didn't seem at all fazed by it. 

There is the love!

Day 18

My apologies for the intermittent postings, but between the combination of mobile phone coverage and that mobile blog uploads still need a little editing before publishing, I have to wait until I have internet access from my laptop.

Naturally, the adventure has continued, this time with a night to remember in Quebec City. The last time I was here I went to a DJ Champion concert outside during the winter festival and it was around -20 degrees. This time it was to a Black Eyed Peas concert, still outside in the "battlefields", but 20+ degrees, with apparently 300,000 other people. 

I don't think I've ever been to a concert where the performers don't make a big deal of the city they're in. However, on this occasion, the Black Eyed Peas claimed that this particular show was the most extraordinary one they'd done in their eleven year touring career. And I have to say that the energy flowing from them into the crowd and back, was like nothing I've ever experienced.

I was intrigued when during this monumental show they referred to an early hit and asked "where is the love?" Not being one to believe in coincidence and because we happen to be traversing the very country that brought about this gig that so impressed them, I figured Nancy and I might as well have a look along the way and see if we can't just find out where the love is.

People have commented that we've been lucky to have driven over 5000 of our 5056km's so far with the roof down. Well I don't believe in luck or coincidence. Have a look at this next photo and the hole that seemed to have opened up for us from the Heavens - a gateway through the weather system so to speak.

Despite rain on either side a golden hole was all we could see at the end of our road - ten minutes later we had stopped with friends for the evening and the weather changed completely with hail, thunder and lightning.

Of course, whilst driving across Canada is fantastique, stopping to play is also very important. And "Wakesurfing 101" for me on the St Lawrence River, Montreal was just the ticket.

And it doesn't hurt to have generous friends with a boat who are also good teachers - merci beaucoup Suzanne!

Day 14

 "It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door," he used to say. 

"You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet,

there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." 

(JRR Tolkien)

And so it was when we stayed in a chalet at Domaine des trois roches, north of Quebec City, inland a little from the south eastern coast of the St Lawrence River. Not only was it an idyllic oasis surrounded by trees, but it afforded us time with yet more generous and convivial people. And when kids are involved you never know what's going to happen. Earlier in the evening Thomas had asked if I would go for a swim with him in the etang (pond) in front of the chalets. At 9.00pm after dinner and glass of wine, most adults could probably think of better things to be doing, but hey, kids know best when it comes to having fun, so why not!

The next morning I was introduced to a Portugese form of squash - Pistole-Basque - playing with Thomas, his dad Mark and his uncle Michel. Although I've played tennis and a little squash it still took a bit of getting used to the shorter wooden raquets/bats. Also, I had the frustratingly sorry tendency of using a tennis backhand to slice the ball when in squash you just give it the bash!

And what could me more relaxing after a day of fun in the sun and water than toasting marshmallows around an open fire!

There are many ways to market products to people. If you're rich and powerful you can hire high powered agencies and utilise the entire spectrum of advertising mediums. This is the front door and the one most consumers protect because they're conditioned to the modern day media onslaught. However, if you're not rich and powerful, there's a less invasive, often more persuasive, cheaper and certainly more fun way of achieving the same outcome. It's colloquially known as guerrilla marketing (after guerrilla warfare such as that of the Spanish versus Napoleon and the Basques versus the Spanish - small and mobile versus large and immobile) and uses the side door.

Here's Thomas "driving" Jaffa with the roof down, photographed and now published on the internet. What do you think he wants for his first car? How much did it cost? Nothing.

Day 12

At 13km long and costing CAD1.3 billion to build, the Confederation Bridge joining Prince Edward Island to New Brunswick, is the longest bridge in the world. Fortuitously we missed the ferry, deciding to drive the extra four hours to take the bridge - and thank goodness we did. All I could say to Nancy when it came into view was "you Canadians sure are industrious little critters!"

We later happened across several siblings on the side of the road just outside of Kensington, Prince Edward Island. They were selling home made jam. Whilst Nancy was getting some money, I made enquiries as to where the strawberries had been procured, to which I was told that that was privileged information. I then asked whether they'd been sourced locally? Perhaps heisted Hobbit-like from Farmer Maggot's farm? To this they pleaded complete innocence, saying that these were real wild strawberries, very small and very much a delicacy - hence the $7 price tag.

It's fair to say that if nothing else, they'll make for good sales people. But the jam too was excellent, clearly made with love.

Speaking of love, some people swear their car goes better after it's been washed and yet many laugh at the notion. But reality's the construct of the mind, so if your car feels better when washed to you, it is better, that's all that matters. I once drove 10,000km's per month on the open road for work and as a result washed my car two, even three times per week. In my experience, or at least in my reality, cars do go better after their washed. It's kind of like a home cooked meal, made with love, will always taste better than even the best restaurant meal. And of course in our case, out of respect for the fact that this Mini - Jaffa - is on loan to us for our trans- Canadian voyage, we're more than happy to keep her looking good.

The thing about travelling from point A to point B with little in the way of timings or plans; you never know what to expect. Via a relative of a friend, we recently found ourselves on the receiving end of hospitality to rival that which I've ever experienced anywhere in the world. Taken in as if members of their family, Claude and Reine from Shippagan, New Brunswick, gave us a bed for two nights, fed us local delicacies and took us out and about to see the local sights including the annual blessing of the fishing fleet. Furthermore, as fellow dog lovers we were greeted, licked and entertained by their two canine companions; Snoopy and Copin.

Day 8

Days seven and eight kind of rolled into each other whilst we were on the ferry back to Nova Scotia from Newfoundland.

However, when we got on the ferry it was past midnight, dark, very misty and 13 degrees, when we got off the ferry it was almost clear blue skies and the temperature was 24 degrees – but it soon rose to over 30 and stayed there until around six that evening. This meant that within 24hrs we had gone from being rugged up in icebreaker gear with all Jaffa’s heat on us to stripped right down to sunscreen level and the air con blowing cool air on our feet. Don’t get me wrong though, this is an integral part to fun of roofless driving.

But having rolled off the ferry initially, Jaffa’s dashboard telemetry was telling us she needed more fuel and of course the tyre pressure sensor was still indicating the running flat tyre. So pulling into the first petrol station we came across, we refuelled and had the puncture repaired. Literally ten minutes later we were on the road again, Jaffa’s thirst satiated, all four paws now pneumatically sound – simple as that. (For your information they tyre cost just CAD10.00 to have repaired)

As we were due on Prince Edward Island, the day was set to be a hot roofless cruise including four provinces (Newfoundland, Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, Prince Edward Island) and the world’s longest bridge – although we didn’t know that at the time.

Initially we were going to ferry over to PEI and bridge/drive back, but we missed the ferry and the next one gave us enough time to drive instead – and thank goodness we did.

 

The Confederation Bridge (Pont de la Confédération) spans almost 13km’s across the Abegweit Passage of Northumberland Strait between New Brunswick and Prince Edward Island. When it came into sight all I could say to Nancy was “cripey, you Canadians sure are industrious little critters! The road seems to just lift off terra firma and make like a huge concrete snake up and out over the ocean. Even if you’re not a fan of Anne of Green Gables, potatoes or lobster, it’s worth visiting Prince Edward Island just for the opportunity to cross this bridge, if you can do it on a hot summer’s day with the roof down in a Mini, even better!

 

 

As for kids, whilst we didn't see many doing interesting stuff, we managed to be a couple ourselves. Here, Nancy and Jaffa sit amongst all the yellow people from the Simpsons. It looks like the characters are superimposed into the shot, but I can assure you they were all there, sitting on the front lawn of this random house at this random lake in Nova Scotia.

Day 7

Still 100km's from our ferry at Channel-Port aux Basques, we were most thankful for the Mini's (RSC) run flat tyres - as the picture clearly shows.

Normally you leave small puncture items in the tyre and drive to where it can be removed and repaired. In this case the 3" hook that punctured our right rear tyre had a large strap of heavy rubber attached to it. As a result it made a hell of a din flinging around inside the wheel arch at 100km/hr so we had no choice but to remove it. However, with run flat tyres and the medium weight we were carrying, we could safely drive 150km's without changing it so long as we slowed to 80km/hr. Aside from feeling a little soft in the rear and not tracking as tightly and precisely as normal, the car felt no different and we  easily got to our destination. 

I've heard of, but never used these tyres before and have been suitably impressed.  As I've said previously, this is not a speed crossing of Canada, so ultimate performance is not imperative, but from a safety (changing a wheel at night) and convenience (changing a wheel in the rain) perspective, run flat tyres are a brilliant option and well worth considering.

Day 6

We're trying to drive as much as possible with the roof down - because kids know how to have fun and they would do this - so sometimes we drive in some slightly inclement weather. In these circumstances a red convertible Mini garners even more attention than normal. But I have to say that to date we've always been exceptionally cosy and I'm not just saying that, I mean it.

One late evening run in Newfoundland saw us sitting in the pocket behind a road train so as to escape being sacked by any rogue moose. (Yeah you can laugh, but two people in Mini convertible don't present much of an obstacle to a 7' Bullwinkle) Despite the low cloud and  drizzle this didn't stop our multi wheeled moose sweeping mate from thundering around sweeping bends, then overtaking when it was straight and he could really put the hammer down. So you can imagine that with us in tow on his slip stream, Newfoundland mist aplenty and darkness, we were in less than perfect roof down conditions. Solution? Crank up the Mini's heated seats, max out its heater to your feet and clad yourself in some icebreaker merino thermal gear. The  result being wind swept toasty exhilaration.

The only extra feature we could use would be a heated steering wheel, something worth getting if you intend to buy a convertible specifically for its intended purpose. As for rain in the cockpit,  even with enough wet stuff to make the auto wipers go to full speed, virtually nothing comes in when you're travelling 90km/hr or more. Of course, if it really pours down, you have to put the roof up of drown. To date we can measure our roof down in 1000's of km's and roof up in a few 100m's.

Day 5

Heading up to North Sydney for the ferry across to Channel-Port aux Basques, we grabbed a coffee at Tim Horton's - as you do on a roady. Whilst there we were slyly advised by some joe quaffing Newfies "ask to be screeched in when we get there." I'm happy to partake in most local customs, especially if it involves varying degrees of inebriation. Earlier this year I spent five days in Ireland over St Patrick's Day and sobriety was definitely not on the list of local customs. Nevertheless, having been "gooned" with a couple of other Canadians in the past, I confess to being just a tad wary of getting "screeched in" with a bunch of ever so sociable Newfoundland Newfies.

On the ferry trip over I was once again caught short of a camera when two little ones took to the floor dancing like no one was watching. Except everyone was watching, but the kids couldn't have cared less -  and why should they, shaking their bacon like a wet dog fresh from the tide.

 

But sometimes what kids say rather than what they do is just as entertaining. I overheard this conversation sitting in a restaurant last night:

Mum - "Well you can do it tonight then?"

Son - "Tonight! Tonight! But I did it on Sunday!"

Mum - "Yes darling, but that was three days ago, you should actually shower everyday."

I can relate to this. As a kid, it was not unheard of for me to go to bed with mud encrusted knees after a day's footballing, cover it all up with long PJ's before getting in and sweeping the larger, chunkier pieces out on to the ground in the morning when they'd chipped off. Now I shower twice a day if able, even three times if it's really hot. Boys will be boys.

Day 4

As the Mini we picked up from Mini Halifax was red with a dark interior, it earned the nickname "Jaffa". Amongst other things, a Jaffa is a small round candy from New Zealand (where I'm from) with a red candy shell and a dark chocolate inside.

Having been shown the in's and out's of this brand new convertible Mini Cooper by Campbell Harbord, the Sales Manager, we set off, roofdown, iPhone teethered, stereo pumping, sun blazing and grins for ear to ear. What lay before us was seven weeks of adventure in a truly fun car.

I've read the motor journo hyperbole about Mini's being shopping trolleys that handle like go-karts so was hoping not to be let down. But before I go on, this trip is about enjoying Canada, it's summer and watching it's children have fun, so the performance nuances of "Jaffa" are a secondary thing and we're certainly not out to break any cross continent land speed records. Nevertheless, I have to say that as a convertible, the Cooper's handling is as precise and predictable as I could have hoped for given how far we were are about to drive it. In the cockpit, the only thing that might have been an improvement, is the ability to charge things (phones, PDA's etc) when the car is not running. Other than that, yes it's small - and so it should be, it's not called Mini for nothing - but it's so much fun to see the world from!

In the 1200+ km's we've travelled in the first four days around Nova Scotia, we've only passed four other Mini's, including one other convertible. But all have proudly acknowledged our passing with a toot or a wave. The Mini clan may be a small one in this part of the world,

but it's a friendly one!

Having said that, Nova Scotians are a friendly bunch of people in general. So far I can make three sweeping generalisations about them:

1) They're very courteous drivers.

2) They like to go to church - or at least they have a lot of them and it was mighty quiet on Sunday until around midday.

3) They like to gather a very large and festideously tidy wood pile in preparation for the winter.

As for fun with the kids, well we've learned quite quickly that if you don't keep a camera on hand at all times you'll miss those priceless shots that only kids can afford us. Of this we ask your forgiveness and patience, hopefully we'll do better at capturing them at their impromptu best in future. In the meantime though, we did manage to see what happens when you let those who don't do the washing of clothes or cars loose in the mud of the Bay of Fundy when the world's highest tide goes out. For what it's worth, although we would have loved to have joined in on this escapade, we don't think Mini Canada would have been overly pleased if we'd managed to stain the upholstery Shubenacadie mud red to match the exterior.

Day 1

Einstein said reality is the construct of the mind. If so,  perhaps we have greater control over the life we live than we think. Perhaps when we turn on the news,  partake in the workplace gossip or follow a trend we're consuming things we don't have to consume and constructing a reality we don't have to live.

I have not Einstein's intellect, Plato's philosophical reasoning or Shakespeare's skill with a quill, but in my reality this much is true, if you want a true take on how the world could be, you need only watch the young and innocent at play. Ask yourself as Cat Steven's sang, "Where Do The Children Play."

Bearing this in mind, how much fun would it be to take the world's most fun car (the Mini), cut it's roof off (a convertible),  drive it from Halifax to Vancouver via Yellowknife and spend some time watching Canada's little ones live, love and play their way through summer?

Well keep reading this blog and from July 2nd until August 20th my friend Nancy and I will be doing just that. Weather and intestinal fortitude willing, we'll also be using Mini's "Openometer" to see how much of our roady across the world's second biggest country we can do with the roof down.

In keeping with the carpe diem spirit of kids, our route is approximate at best and we thus welcome any feedback regarding places, events or people others think we should visit. In the meantime, we'll be picking up "Jaffa" (nickname) from the Halifax Mini dealership before heading out to the Bay of Fundy to witness one of the world's highest tidal changes and its tidal bore. After that, well other than heading roughly west-ish, who knows?